Getting to know each other

Since being home from the hospital we have been doing a whole lot of nothing, and yet it's been an exhausting lot of nothing! Everett and I are becoming reaquainted. We are trying to re-learn how to co-exist, and do even the simplest of things. He's trying to remind me how he likes to nurse, the new ways he likes to be held and the owie spots that he'd rather I not touch. I'm trying to remind him how much he loves kisses and gentle squeezes, trying to show him that I can be gentle and still secure him in my arms and desperately trying to work the tape off of his poor battered skin. Yesterday I think I gave him too many loves, and as a result he was up most of the night in extra pain. Even cuddling with mom all day is hard work when you are used to hanging out in a hospital bed full time. We've given him extra medicine, and I've tried to give him a little more space today (a little, not a lot mind you!)

I've been a little down today. Along with learning a new Evie routine, I'm also trying to process the events of the last couple of weeks. In my life, I have found that Heavenly Father blesses me with an incredible amount of strength to push through difficult experiences. I was given peace and courage during Evie's hospital stay, his surgery, and his recovery. But as was the case in the past, after the experience is over it takes me a while to process it all, mourn for the experience I have had, and move forward. I'm incredibly grateful for everything--the doctors and nurses who performed this difficult surgery with excellence, my friends and family who have supported and loved our family, a Heavenly Father who I KNOW loves my family and has constantly watched over and protected us. And yet I don't find it ungrateful to process what has happened--to try and make sense of it. In my experience, it's in the disecting of our trials that we are able to understand what Heavenly Father wants us to learn, and how we can use that newfound knowledge to bless His other children. It's also in the disecting of our trials that we can see with clear eyes all of the blessings and miracles that were given. So today has been a day of reflection. I am trying to see what He sees in me, what He sees in Ev, and what He sees for our family. And one thing I have seen perfectly--He loves us.

As I mentioned last night was a rough one for little Everett. He was up every hour moaning and crying (although he doesn't have a voice, so his cry is weak and breathy--barely audible). Everett has never been a baby that cries a lot, so when the tears start flowing you know things are not good. James was doing homework downstairs and I decided that Evie and I should watch a movie together to keep our mind off of the pain (it worked like a charm in the hospital). Jim started cracking up when he came upstairs and saw us snuggling in bed together. And of course the movie, mixed with Mommy-snuggling and a Daddy-sighting, brought forth lots of smiles!

And when I started laughing, he wanted to know what was so funny. He arched his little neck and refused to take his eyes off of me for at least 2 minutes! I am NOT complaining at all...how could I? He is the sweetest baby ever. Hopefully tonight will be better in the sleeping department and his little body will continue to heal.

In other news, Talmage will be coming home tomorrow after a fun week at Mema and Pepa's house. He has been spoiled with love, attention and things and I fear he may go through culture shock when I'm in charge again! I am SO grateful that my parents gave T a stress-free, fun-loving week. Everyday he has reported to me about new things he's done, places he's been and yummy treats he's eaten. It's a blessing to have family so close. I love that little rascaly two-year-old (who is getting more 3 everyday). I can't wait to see him. Our house and family are not complete without him.